What's In A Name

I never thought things through, 

all my thoughts vanish with you.

Engraving my heart,

but deflecting my head, 

the poison of your words is starting to spread.

Negativity seeps, depression creeps,

Your love is dry and talk is cheap.

I try to take matters in my own hands,

but you're relentless, heartless,

nothing withstands.

My love starts to vanish,

this smile is a lie,

you think I'm nervous, 

that I've gone shy.

If only you knew all my thoughts,

if you saw the trap,

before you were caught.

#21 I can't even fathom the fact that I have posted twenty different things on this site, remarkable when you think about it. I have no idea what I would do, if I didn't write. I mean I write more than you would think, I'm in the mist of a short story right now :) hehe. I guess my creativity and inspiration is a gift in itself. I mean sometimes I don't realize it, but I don't have what you would call just average writing abilities for a fifteen year old, at least that is what I like to think and although I do experience writers block from time to time, writing is what I turn to for self expression and without it, who knows what I would be like. (p.s. look at this a video AND a picture)

Stress

How can I handle a world,

that can barely handle me?

How can I break through a barrier,

when I barely have strength to breath?

How can I move mountains,

when I trip on pebbles in the sand,

Pitty is much easier to come up with,

than to make an actual plan.

#19 I have to say that I am thankful for school. Sometimes I question the reason as to why humans imparticular go to school, why us? What did we do to deserve this? Knowledge can be the most powerful and most harmful tool in our entire lives and school is exactly what gives us this knowledge and teaches us how to use it. I can't imagine ever being home-schooled, no matter how "similar" people may say it is, to me, it isn't not at all. I would have never met ninety-five percent of my friends had it not been for school. But when you think about it, I would have never created ninety-five percent of my problems had it not been for school. But that is what life is about gaining knowledge today and using it for tomorrow. To my teachers, all the faculty of the school, yes even that mean janitor on the first floor, thank you, not that I think they will ever read this :P

Freedom is overrated?

I told myself that once I was out of your grasp,

out from your hell,

from under your wing,

I would be free of you,

but here I am,

 indecisive,



chained to your charisma,

enslaved by your charm,

trapped through your smile,

where am I to go,

I reach toward the sky,

with my feet still on the ground,

cement blocks strapped to my feet,

wings crushed by your horror,

imagination destroyed by your manipulation,

hope disintegrate by your judgement,

but then again it was my fault,

for coming back to you again.

#16 I am thankful for that fact that I can learn from my mistakes, I have no idea how we as a whole would be able to move forward, become innovative, or quite frankly live, if we had not learned from our past. History repeats itself, people may seem changed but they never truly are, you can drill into a person's head what is right and wrong, but they will never truly understand what is outside of their own nature. If we can all find one fault in our selves then maybe we can come to accept two faults in someone else. We can find a reason to love instead of a reason to hate, and ultimately learn to come together on the things that we love, not be torn apart by them.

Up To The Sky, Just To Fall Back On The Ground

 

My feet were planted firmly on the ground

So why am I high in the sky right now?

Floating freely

but underneath sinking deeply

everything in life has a dark twist to it

almost as if we are never just "safe" 

I can try and pull my self out from underneath a black whole,

but do I really ever escape?

#13 I am grateful for having blogger in the first place, it has actually brought me some pretty cool experiences and I have been able to share my true feelings about anything and not have to feel like hiding them from the public (: